“I used to think grief was about letting go and moving on. I no longer think that is true. Grief is not letting go. It is letting in. Grief is not moving on. It is moving with,” writes hospital chaplain J.S. Park in his new book As Long As You Need: Permission to Grieve.
Park and others have shown me the important role grief plays in both personal transformation and social action.
For the past 11 months, a small grassroots faith-based group I am part of has led a weekly vigil for peace in response to the violence in Palestine and Israel. We gather weekly and hold our attention on immense suffering. Allowing other people’s pain into our hearts keeps us from becoming numb to violence and helps sustain our activism.
For decades, eco-philosopher and Buddhist Scholar Joanna Macy has been helping people see themselves as part of the web of life that is threatened by climate change. Grieving environmental degradation and our separation from the rest of nature is part of what Macy calls The Work the Reconnects. Grief is letting in so we can move with compassion and wisdom to face planetary suffering.
At every memorial service I officiate, I point out that the shortest and perhaps most profound verse in the Bible is “Jesus wept.” God grieves. God lets the pain of the world in, deeply connecting with creation, and being moved into redemptive solidarity with all those who suffer. Good grief is the work that reconnects.
